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It’s been awhile since I’ve posted. I blame this entirely upon my lack of running. I’ve been very disheartened with the sport lately. After I pinched my nerve I just never got back in the swing of things. Oh well. But as I’m about to move out of my house into a new (Asian) world I figure I should write an update.

Where to start, where to start…? Hmmm, ah first thing’s first, my last post was the day before I saw Mumford and Sons. If you haven’t heard them yet then that means we haven’t gotten drunk together since last December. That’s a shame because they are phenomenal. I went to the show with a posse of beautiful women following me.  As we walked in a storm was a brewin’ and our tickets were destroyed the second they left our pockets. Yet the babes at the gates let us in and then I had a brilliant idea, “I will lie my way into the pit and tell them that I had a pit ticket.” When I walked down to the pit Marie and I only had a small effort convincing them that we had pit tickets, so they sent us back to the gates to get VIP tickets. Next thing I knew it Iwas drinking 108 oz. of beer and screaming my lungs off twenty feet away from Mumford.

The next exciting thing I did this summer was go to the beautiful wedding. of James and Maria Fulmer. There was dancing and entirely too much Scotch and a lot of catching up with people I haven’t seen since graduation. There might have also been a sailing trip the next day, though I’m weary to dub it as such – we made it about three hundred yards due to thunder storms. However the Flemings (three of them, in fact), their significant others, Dan Connelly, Micah and I had a splendid time swimming.  Next on the docket was another sailing trip led by Captain Robbo a few weeks later. Also a splendid time and sadly the last time I’ll go sailing for quite awhile I fear.

Probably the most fun I’ve had this summer (outside of my many music ventures) was the beach trip I made with my bff, E Flem, and some crazy ass dude named David from her CTY camp. I’ve been to the beach every year of my life and would like to keep that tradition going. We made it over to Rehoboth. I immediately went to Grotto’s Pizza (my favorite pizza place, ever) ordered a slice, a shot of Scotch and a beer. This happened about three more times later in the day. Otherwise we enjoyed the sand, played in the water and worked on our tans (or in my case the severe sun burnt I had gotten from seven hours of croquet on the national mall the day before – I won all my games). We also went to Dogfish Head and had a delicious lunch and I consumed more alcohol. When the day was over we stopped at E Flem’s camp for some ultimate frisbee and a little bit of soccer. I was relived to find that I’m still half decent at outdoor soccer and decided I will never play indoor again. Finally on the way home Rachel and I had a ridiculous sing along.

Since then I have seen A Perfect Circle not once, but twice.  The first time I saw them was in NYC where I also met the hottest babe I could have ever been with but upon meeting her friends decided I was too drunk to deal with it then got lost in NYC. But more importantly the show was phenomenal. I went to the first show sober (drank a lot of Scotch there though). The set list they played wasn’t quite what I had hoped for though so after spending the next day hanging out with my daughter, Tabitha, and an old friend, Hannah Custis, I came back to DC to see them again with Shawn Witherow and Natalie Stuart. This time they played everything I had wanted.  on top of that I was delicious not sober and more importantly I got us the best fucking seats ever, seriously I could have hopped on stage if I wanted to.

And the last event of the summer was Nate and Rowenna Oesch’s wedding last weekend. It was as much fun as the first one. After the wedding Micah, Dalton, Robbie and I were given way too many free bottles of wine. Somehow we managed to make it into the BBC where we decided to consume them so that we wouldn’t spend that much money at Harry Brown’s (epic failure for me, by the by). However, we didn’t have an opener so Dalton assured us you could open them with a shoe (he failed). At Harry Brown’s I ended up buying every Green Wave present (included the aforementioned plus John Dusenbury and Gil Shank) a round of car bombs. Then Micah and I did car bombs because I wanted to prove I could do one faster than him. I cannot. My bill became quite large as I ordered several other shots while Dalton kept ordering water for me. Best croquet partner ever. My night ended by jumping off the bridge over College Park several times in honor of one Bob Stieber. No one else would join me unfortunately.

So. That’s been my summer. It was Hella rad. What has also been rad is this mixed CD project I’ve been doing. All the CDs are phenomenal and I’ve been introduced to some sweet new music. I’m terribly excited for the ones I have yet to get. My favorites from each person’s CD are as follows:
Jurassic 5 (Clint)mr
Citizen Cope (Rachel)
Zac Brown Band (Johnnie)
 Shearwater (Sam Porter)

No lyrics to end this post, I just posted a million music videos.


Since I last updated I’ve been to two concerts. Paul Simon and ManMan. Paul Simon was absolutely phenomenal. Easily the best show I’ve ever been to. I was a little worried because other than his greatest hits (which includes all of Graceland), I actually haven’t listened to him a ton. I mean I’ve listened to all of his CDs just why listen to anything other than Graceland if you can be listening to Graceland? The show had a subdued atmosphere after giving Paul a standing ovation when he walked in. Everyone just sat in awe. As he went through song after song I was pleased to recognize almost all of them, usually well enough to sing along. Then Diamonds on the Soles of her Shoes came on and the entire crowd erupted into dance (note: 50 year olds dancing everywhere around you is terrifying). This atmosphere remained the rest of the show and was only subdued briefly when Paul paid tribute to the duo he started off with by playing Sound of Silence. At one point he seemed to forget the lyrics to Gumboots but let a lucky individual in the front row up onto stage to take over for him (that dude fucking nailed it, too).  That just made the whole show a lot more fun. Fortunately Paul played almost all of Graceland… unfortunately the only songs he didn’t play were Graceland and Call Me Al (and well Homeless but that hardly counts). All in all he played for about two and a half hours and every second was breathe taking. The highlight of the night for me (because he didn’t play Graceland or Call Me Al) was hearing him cover Here Comes the Sun – it’s been my favorite Beatles song since forever and it was great hearing his rendition. I’m really disappointed I didn’t get a chance to talk to Paul Simon, I intended to ask him “Where exactly are there lasers in the jungle?”

Obviously ManMan paled in comparison though they were fun. That is before I left the show horribly early. Some asshole grabbed my balls, I pushed him away, he grabbed my ass, I punched him. His friend proceeded to elbow me in the back of the head, I turned around and uppercut him, dodged his punch and jacked him again. As I was pulled away from him he tried to grab me and I bit him. I felt like a champ, until I went to the bathroom and saw the dude outside talking to a Pig. Worried, in my drunken state, that I would be the one to get into trouble (and wouldn’t be allowed to go to Korea as a result!) I hid in the bathroom then left the venue pretty early. Oh well, I had fun while it lasted. Tomorrow is Mumford.  I’m sure that’ll be way better, anyway.

In other news: my running has taken a large hit. I’ve dropped my weekly mileage goal down from 60 to a measily 20. I just keep getting injured when I get above 20 and it fucking sucks. I’m not going to be fast at this pace and it’s aggrevating. In good news, I’m going to the first wedding of my life this weekend and am terribly excited. Lotsa friends in town for it, which is nice and I’m a big fan of the couple getting hitched. Plus Micah and I are playing croquet that morning / sailing the next day.

Finally: I’ve set aside a goal for myself to memorize one poem a week. I miss this activity and used to feel bad ass when I could drunkenly recite The Hollow Men.

It was all your fault you whore, you really fucked it up this time (wait those aren’t the lyrics…)

Recently I’ve realized it’s somewhat strange I have friends. I mean, all I do is make fun of them. How did I become friends with them in the first place? I’m not really sure.  On a very base level I think the fact that I am somewhat needy is what led me to my group of friends. I crave attention, I need people around me. So in college I bought Guitar Hero and invited everyone and their mother over to play, with offers of beer to go along with it. Once I trapped people I continued doing nice acts (driving people around, doing beer runs, picking up the tab at bars because it made me happy to see everyone else have fun, etc), and after awhile they ignored the fact that I made fun of them for sucking all the time (you guys do suck) and noticed the fact that as I was saying offensive, obnoxious things I was committing generally nice acts. This is the difference between my hero and me. He’s just a full blown jackass (well I guess he saved Kyle’s life that one time). My sarcastic asshole self stems from the relationship I had with my grandfather – I’m not sure why but we always picked on each other all the time. And since this occurred between the person I’ve loved most in my life and me, obviously I do it with anyone else I take a liking to. On the other hand it seems like a very normal thing to do – initially I wrote “a very guy thing to do” but my female friends do it as well – to pick on each other I mean. I wonder why this is – are we criticizing each other so that flaws we see in our friends are improved? Or do we just like comedy? I wonder what Aristotle and Plato said on this, I wish I knew Phaedrus better, I think I’ll read that again once I finally finish Anna K (this book is taking me forever). However I ended up with the friends I have is ultimately immaterial, and I’m damned glad that I did as I have some amazing friends.

This whole post has started because my friend base is dwindling once again. Clint moved out this morning, and Johnnie will be moving for his internship this summer soon (good thing Rachel Ulrich and I are now best friends and she’s cooler than Johnnie, anyway).  And as it dwindles I once again find myself wondering, “How the fuck do you meet people after college?” Nate and I joined an indoor soccer league and I thought I’d meet people (i.e. babes, but the coed was full) there but as it turns out I think we are two of four people who know English on the team. One of the other two is pretty old and the other one seems like a douche (also a problem of mine: until I get drunk with someone I generally dislike them). It doesn’t help that I’m extremely shy. I mean, I guess ultimately it doesn’t matter because I’m moving really fucking far away, but once I get there I need to figure out how to meet people I actually like. Obviously I’m just too virtuous to be surrounded by scoundrels all the time, I learned this from Aristotle. Good thing Jake will be there when I get there (and hopefully Batt Mutler!). Ultimately, I think I’m just kinda bummed the Johnnie household of 09 graduates is no more (Robbo and I are in the minority now!). Oh well.

But! Despite friends moving away, I have been doing some Hella rad stuff in my time outside of work lately. The days of practicing for SC2 glory are gone (Clint is probably to blame for that, he encouraged it the most and as he was leaving that encouragement became less meaningful to me), and I’ve been adventuring out of the house. First off is the indoor league. What a weird game that sport is. It’s fun, I enjoy bouncing the ball off the wall crazily, but it’s also insanely fast. And not fast in the way I excel at (i.e. running fast), but a lot of quick little touches moving the ball around. Patrick convinced me to try to limit myself to two touches (trap, pass) and that has helped a lot. But being that my team doesn’t know each other (and most can’t communicate with each other), there are a lot of people who dribble around way too much. Whatever, it’s fun. Other than that I’ve ended up hiking three times in the past week. This is especially nice as it reminds me of Pennsylvania. And tomorrow I’m going sailing! I can hardly wait.

Yeah so my life is pretty awesome. I’m an alcoholic who has great friends, goes hiking, plays croquet, and goes sailing. All of these are done better while drunk, so clearly I love this. More friends would be nice – good thing Joao is moving into DC soon.

I’m doing a CD exchange plan with friends before I leave for Korea. If you would like a mixed Cd from me, I will make you a mixed CD in exchange. Clint and I swapped last night, his mix is pretty rad. It introduced me to the awesomeness that is Jurassic 5. If you’re interested, let me know.

“No man is a failure who has friends.”

We been friends for a long time, a very close friend of mine

A week ago I went to the National Art Gallery with the goal of “Prove Plato wrong,” (impossible). For those unfamiliar with The Republic’s Book X, he makes a claim there that art is bad. For years I have used him as a crutch to attack art, because frankly it makes no fucking sense to me. I went to the MoMa senior year with Robbo, Tabs, Sam Porter and Sam Yelton and found myself thoroughly confused. As I stared at a “painting” of a large red square I thought, “Well this is fucking stupid and why is it art?” The trip to the National Art Gallery was an attempt to destroy the physical need to hurl when encountered with art. I believe it was succesful. While examining the many beauties hidden in Thomas Cole’s Voyage of Life I couldn’t find a reason to dislike it and wondered what it was that Plato disliked in art. Later I walked to the modern art museum and found my old friend Nausea return. However, I decided I couldn’t use Plato as a crutch anymore, I mean why should I? That garbage was invented millenia after he wrote. So I decided to reread Book X.

It quickly occurred to me that I was slightly misremembering what Plato meant. When Plato attacks art he attacks all art – poetry, theater, etc. (This reminded me of the horror that it was dealing with my fellow freshmen whining, “But I like poetry, I like reading novels, wahwahwah.”) Of course Plato also liked poetry, he not only read it but wrote it as well. So what was his point? Censorship. He didn’t want the sophistry that polluted the poets to be able to attack him, he didn’t want idiots teaching the youth.

So here we are in modern America with giant red blocks that claim to be art. So what? As I said they don’t teach anything. They are fucking stupid (and I don’t care what your art history friends tell you, they are fucking stupid, too). Fortunately I have South Park to remind me the extent of that stupidity. In this case all they did was point out to me that this exists. What. The. Fuck. Why do people pay to see this filth? I just don’t get it.  I’ve heard that the movie is supposed to be satire on other torture porn movies, but movies like Saw and Hostile should have never existed in the first place. People should not be desentized to violence, and no one should pay money to watch someone be tortured for two hours. Of course I’m extremely critical of these movies because horror films in general give me nightmares, I close my eyes when Jack performs surgery in Lost and these particular movies make me physically ill. Then again I think people should have those reactions.

Of course this leaves the question of “How much censorship” should there be, but that’s too intelligent of an issue for my tiny blog to attack. One I really have no idea how to handle – though I think Plato does so well, allowing Socrates (the man who has seen The Good and The Beautiful) to see these things but not lesser men. Of course I’m not him and yet I watch South Park religiously…

So instead I’ll discuss a form of art I thoroughly enjoy – music.  I went to see Bad Religion and Rise Against last night and had a dandy little time. Bad Religion only played one song from their new CD so I found myself singing along to every other song. They put on a phenomenal show. It’s also fun to see a bunch of fifty year old dudes rocking out. Rise Against played a few too many new songs for my tastes (their new shit has gotten poppy) but I still enjoyed myself in the pit – they still know how to get a crowd moving. Unfortunately moving in Baltimore consists of a bunch of douchebags, one of which gouged my fucking eye. Also, why the fuck did Bad Religion play before Rise Against? They kept making jokes about being “fluffers,” but seriously one of these bands is thirty years old and the other is already turning into garbage.

Finally I think I’ve fallen in love with my hair stylist. Not only does she give me a perfect haircut when all I tell her is, “I’m going to an event in which I might see ex girlfriends,” she recently dyed her hair red. What a wonderful woman. Speaking of which, I am both excited and terrified about croquet. Excited to see friends, terrified of potential encounters with any psycho ex girlfriends. (Not all of them fit that category, just most, and one of them will definitely be there.)

If you are wondering, I cried and cuddled PenPen when I found out the Pens lost. So don’t make fun of them =(

I want to bathe you in holy water, I want to kill you, upon the altar

Haven’t updated in awhile because I took a hiatus from running. I’m fairly certain I pinched a nerve in my knee. After a month off though I got back into the swing of things and have been performing solidly since then. After three days back I hopped into a race that ARS put on. My time was pretty pathetic, but I led the majority of the race then crumbled near the end so I didn’t feel too bad. Took second, and am pretty sure if I hadn’t lost a month’s worth of endurance training I woulda been fine. The week after that I hopped into a Fun Run at Pacers and flew through 5.2 miles in 32 minutes. I was a little upset, I had a huge lead on everyone else and wanted to glide though the last mile, but some dude had to take a shit so he cut half a mile off and then we plowed through the last mile. It felt great though. Haven’t ran that fast in ages. Tomorrow is the first soccer game of the spring season, and I’m terribly excited for it, but afterwards I plan on doing a hill workout on the Naval Academy Bridge. I haven’t had a serious workout like what I’m planning since I used to run with Cole, Maria, Jenn and hewhoshallnotbenamed. I’m just doing repeats over it at a moderate pace, but it should be fun. Speed workouts are the reason I enjoy running.

Otherwise my life is going FUCKINGPHENOMENALLY. I might only be super excited because I bought tickets to A Perfect Circle this morning, and it felt like finding treasure, but I have a lot of fun things lined up before Korea. Soccer for the next month, croquet, concerts out the ass (Bad Religion, Rise Against, Mumford, APC*2, Paul Simon, Strung Out, ManMan), then hopefully a little travelling. I need to get my damned Visa though and this background check is taking for fucking ever. That’s all, not much going on in my life at this exact moment just tons of things to look forward to. Also, Lent is over in two weeks and I’m still going strong.

Hope your weekend treats you well. I’m sure mine will. Gonna go get some cheap tacos with the blonde. Did I mention I got APC tickets, when I thought I’d never get to see them live since they broke up? BOHYAH.

Tugging a beat to the sight of you lying

So I’m participating in Lent this year. It’s really just a second attempt at the New Year’s Resolution of cutting back on alcohol intake. But I’m being clever about it: I’m giving up buying alcohol. This is key for several reasons:

1) I can still drink, but I hate leeching off of others so I won’t drink much when it is offered to me
2) But I will cut back on alcohol, because I am the biggest enabler at my house
3) I will save tons of money (I spent 200 on alcohol last weekend, mostly on White Russian ingrediants)
4) I can still drink as much as I want in celebration of St. Paddy’s Day (Dropkick Murphy’s concert at Shamrock Fest with an Open Bar, tickets purchased ages ago)
5) Pretty ladies can still buy me drinks (this happens frequently, I assure you)

In other news, Micah convinced me to join a croquet tournament at Merion the day of College Nationals. Lent will end while I am there so that will be fun. Also I haven’t run in three weeks due to a knee injury. I’m pissed.

We had guns and drums and drums and guns

Been a frustrating week. I got sick, which rarely happens to me and usually passes quickly if I just work out more. But I haven’t run for a week because there is an intense pain on the back side of my knee. Then as I drove home Saturday from work my truck suddenly stopped working. Fortunately I drifted two miles (due to my awesome foresight I was driving eighty five mph) and parked on the shoulder of an exit ramp. Basically all the power shut off, it was really strange. So James tried to come and jump my battery but it turned out it was full of power. So I called for a tow truck that didn’t come for an hour then called for another one and walked home. It’s going to cost 1300 to fix my truck but Grandma Thompson offered to pay for it. I’m not going to let her, well I am, but I’m paying her back slowly with each pay check.

But really I’m just annoyed that I haven’t been running. Tonight I stayed after work to run on our treadmill. At first it didn’t hurt at all, but several miles later it felt like I was hit with a baseball bat. I don’t know what to do. Everytime I get my mileage back up and my times start dropping something fucks up. Usually it’s my ankle but that hasn’t been a problem for awhile fortunately. I think I need to find a new way to plan out my training. I just don’t get how I ran 80 miles a week the summer before my senior year, through my senior year, and never had any problems. Maybe I’m just getting old? I mean obviously I’m not that old, but I am older and injuries aren’t overcome quite as easily as they were then. On the other hand the summer between junior and senior year I was training for the Honolulu Marathon and that went really well (until I sprained my ankle playing basketball, not that it mattered since I couldn’t leave Maryland, anyway, due to my dumbass getting a DUI).

Bah, fuck.

At least it’s March. I love March. Things get warm. And St. Paddy’s Day rolls in. Best holiday ever. Also Cole is in town this weekend.

Cartman joins NAMBLA is one of the most disgusting South Park episodes of all time.

I know the pieces fit

I was in a pretty shitty mood today. I planned on waking up at seven to go for a run so I could do stuff after work. I slept till nine. Then I ripped my favorite jeans. I blame one of these for the rocky start to my day. But the latter means I get to go buy new clothes (note: if any babe wants to boost my confidence by coming along to tell me what my ass looks great in, let me know). And my plans for the night were cancelled, so I got my run in. Immediately afterwards everything felt right in the universe again.  Surprised how well my run went tonight after I took last week off, but I usually run better when grumpy, too bad I’m rarely ever grumpy. I took last week off due to Superbowl hang over turned into sickness. Seriously, I couldn’t speak properly until Saturday. Things seem to be back on track this week now.

After my run I caught the end of Jeopardy. I watched the first two Watson episodes but since it had such a dominating lead I didn’t care so much about tonight’s show. Though I’m glad to see Jennings gave Watson a run for its money tonight, I’m even happier that Watson dominated. Before SJC I wanted to teach English (and be a famous poet on the side, hah!) or work on Actual Intelligence (an infinitesimally small part of me hoped I’d go pro in running). I chose SJC over Carnegie Mellon due to financial reasons and am extremely happy things turned out as they did, but I’m still really interested in true A.I. I see Watson as a huge step in the right direction for technology. And even though James might be right, he thinks this might be the start of Terminator or the Matrix, I’m totally cool with that.

I’m really excited for the next week. First off Friday/Saturday I’m downloading Radiohead’s new CD at midnight and listening to it. Then actual Saturday I’m forcing people to go to the 80’s Alt Pop night at Black Cat after playing extensive BOOM! Sunday I’m going to museums. I have an interview with a dude from the Great Hearts Academies. Next Wednesday I’m going to Annapolis so Clint can get his ass kicked by the Green Waves while I pop into the Annapolis Running Shop to hop in with their group run (first time running with people in ages). After that we are going to Big Beer. Even if the rest of my week sounds boring, I know you are jealous of that last part.

Oh, and I bought tickets to see Rise Against and Bad Religion. I’m pumped.

*Another quote with no real meaning to my life currently. Just a great quote from my favorite Valentine’s Day episode of South Park. Oh happy belated Vday. ❤

If strength is born from heartache, then mountains I could move

Great weekend. I consumed more alcohol in the past three days than I have in the past month.  Micah, Molly and Carolyn came down Friday. We started an 80s Music Power Hour at midnight, and drank until four AM. I’m proud of Carolyn for actually committing to it, while the other women in the house (i.e. Clint and MoRo) did not join in (Cassie was gone). Saturday I made everyone tacos and we played boom for a very long time. Also there was a lot of Little Lion Man being played. Carolyn ordered ice cream to be delivered (HOW AWESOME IS THAT?!) and everyone in the house drank to excess.

Yesterday started off with a bang. At 11 o clock we rolled into the gym lot and went to Castlebay brunch. It was delicious and I had three Bloody Mary’s and a mamosa. This was followed by a croquet match between Dan Connelly and me against Micah and Robbo on front campus. Dan and I lost by one wicket, but I had a nice six wicket run I’m proud I pulled together after not playing for a long ass time.  Also some assholes walked up to us and asked “Do you support traditional marriage?” Not realizing what they meant Micah and Dan said yes. I mostly ignored them until I heard, “They are killing themselves off with AIDs.” Dan responded, “Straight people have AIDs, too,” and then I flipped shit. Upon informing them that I am bisexual they told me “You know, you can get help for that,” and “We’d prefer it if you stayed on the straight side.” I told them “Look I can’t help it my dick gets hard when I think of certain guys and if I fuck one of them in the ass how does it affect you?” Clearly this did not go over well and Dan convinced them to leave quickly.

Of course Pittsburgh lost the big game but our party was a huge success. We had 22 people over and played more Boom afterwards. It was a great evening and I’m super happy even though we lost. Also I had the sweetest outfit ever, I’m disappointed no pictures were taken.

Also I ran another timed mile last Wednesday. It went absolutely awful, I ran a 5:06, 16 seconds behind my goal time and 11 behind my last timed mile. I went through the first half at 2:08 and clearly am not in shape to follow that up. I blame the fact that I had to use my iPod to time myself and running with music fucks me up when I’m doing a serious run. Oops.

Also Pittsburgh is still better than your team. Three trips and two wins there in six years is fucking awesome. I’m going to go have a mamosa.

And I can feel it coming in the air tonight, Oh Lord

I got the job in South Korea! I need to get a federal background check done and get my visa by April, they are looking for schools for me and we will discuss things then. I am also applying to the Great Hearts and am finding myself more and more invested in that option. Teaching Great Books and mathematics to kids interested in learning as well as coaching cross country or track sounds fabulous to me. Also I have always wanted to live in the southwest since I visited Santa Fe sophomore year. But I’m still terribly excited about Korea, living abroad seriously interests me and even if Korea is not my ideal place to live, it’s different. At the very least, if I don’t get a job at Great Hearts I have a back up plan.

I also finally have the money set aside to pay off Mr. Sinnett for the Calculus intensive. I am terribly happy about this as I have felt awful for not paying him for so long. I’m also setting aside money to travel to Texas, I’m really uncertain if I should drive or fly. If I can get someone to go with me a road trip would be Hella rad and cheaper. Plus I could go to Graceland.

Speaking of Graceland, I listened to it three times on the way home today. Not the song, the entire CD. My commute home took two hours.  That was awful. But, I seriously enjoyed running in the snow storm. It really sucked at first, but once my face went numb everything lit up around me in all its beauty. Despite everyone and their mother telling me I shouldn’t be running in these conditions it was the most fun I’ve had running in awhile. So gorgeous! Oh! I also saw a lightning bolt split a tree on my drive home and that was phenomenal. I wish someone was with me to see it.


Live to win, ’till you die, ’till the light dies in your eyes